.kiko kiki lala.

you don't want to hurt someone who likes you  but  . . . you don't want to hurt the one you love most even more.  i  don't want to be in this position. let me die  let me die i want to cry in this bed till my eyes sore let me live let me live i want to have the smile back on my face

March is coming to an end soon,  but I wish it won't be this soon. I don't want it to end, baby,  Cause it's been a hell of a month fr me. Oh, I'm twenty one now but I'm living like a sixteen, this life's wonderful if you look at the small things. friends or foes, let us live like you'll die tomorrow, cause it's the only way to leave all your sorrow. It's time to grow but i want to stay young forever. because in life, it's either now or never. Oh, I'm twenty one now but I'm living like a twenty six. this life is full with colour in wonderful mix. but this world does not only revolves around you, because in here, there are other creatures too. friends or foes, let us live with no regret, cause all that shit we can surely forget. oh, then once you died, what is left is your name. and so please, please, just don't tarnish it with shame.

It's been a while since I had this chance to breath. I was so busy, running around, panting and gasping for a bit of oxygen to be sucked on my lungs. Starting after my magical journey to Kuantan, I've been having two weeks of real horror. Though I still manage to squeeze in a time or two for some fun, the rest are all work. Here I am to apologise to all the people whom I unintentionally neglected, whom their message had been left with no reply, and those who felt hurt by my words though I did try as much to cover this mountains of emotion that had been bundled up inside. I had been in total wreck, yes, it may have not been depicted clearly in my face, but I am. Me whole self don't do myself justice when it comes to this thing, I prefer to pretend, to show people I am coping well, when Allah knows how horrid I am inside. And now it's holiday, ahhhh, finally. I know there's lots of assignment to do in this so called holiday but still,  there's no

jiwa kacau kalut melalut jauh ke laut serabut bagaikan sabut tatkala ini.. aku rasakan mahu berlari lari jauh hingga ke penghujungnya aku mahu mendongak mentari aku mahu terbaring, mengira bintang di langit aku mahu ketawa dengan jenaka kamu yang sinis aku mahu pergi ke situ semula hati aku bukan di sini lagi hati aku tertinggal di situ

Banyak nak cakap tapi tak tahu macam mana nak lunas kan dalam perkataan. semua post post aku yang lepas sebenarnya aku tulis lama dah dalam 2-3 minggu yang lepas. tapi aku scheduled kan biar dia post secara regular. kononkonon nak menampakkan macam aku ni rajin menghapdet belog *padahal nakharom tidak. dekat bilik pon aku jarang menulis. jarang duduk dan membuat list cantik2 macam yang aku suka buat. aku balik bilik habis masa dengan berbaring dan tidur. tapi aku takde lah masuk aktiviti apa2 secara specific, at least takde lah macam dulu. kenapa penat nya pun tak tahu. Bulan ni banyak juga hari aku bakal melarikan diri ke tanah asing. Masih di tanah Malaysia tapi bukan di Kuala Lumpur. Aku rasa aku perlu berjalan dan melihat dunia, macam yang selalu aku angan2 dari dulu lagi. Mungkin akan banyak lagi benda2 kecil yang bermakna bakal aku jumpa & belajar. eh dah la. apa ke mellow nya lah post ni. sumpah membazir masa. haha. xP

Aku bukan nak cakap apa. Tapi aku suka kehidupan kat UIA. sumpah aku rasa macam nak graduate lambat lambat supaya aku boleh stay kat UIA tu lelama. tapi oleh sebab kalau aku tak graduate makanya selagi itulah aku takleh kahwin *ehhh?* jadinya aku kena cepat2 graduate. oke ini merepek. sila abaikan perenggan pertama post ni.  __________________________________________________________________________________ baiklah, banyak benda yang aku suka pasal UIA ni tapi untuk episod kali ni aku hanya akan cerita beberapa point je kay uolss.  1. UIA cantik dan bangunan dia macam Hogwarts, School of Witchcraft & Wizardy.  betul oke, ini betul. bukan nak gebang tapi memang aku rasa UIA cantikkkk sangat. hihihi. And and kalau kau memang gila Harry Potter dan kau suka merendek merata sampai seantero UIA tu kau dah terjah, kau akan faham maksud aku. jangan memain weyh, aku 1st year dah pusing satu UIA hokayy. kau tahu tak UIA ada tempat helikopter mendarat, haaa haaa? mana mana?  and banguna