Chapitre 02.4: the epiphany

thanks for making me realize who i am, who i was. truly thanks.

i had soo long left the person i used to be. the one i adore, and people adore so much. the one people hate so much because they can't bear the fact that they can't be me. the one people fear and look with envy, for i am strong, untouchable, yet subtle and feminine. the one i must consider, though how much i want to deny it, as the real me.

the real me that is hidden deep beneath the shadows of unforgotten memories. and i never thought u would be the one digging for me. i had truly underestimate u. u just know me for three years, but you already surpass everyone else that know me more than you did. i would have known. because the first time i ever saw you, even i didn't know u, i felt something that is within you which is within me, too.

but too fool am i to deny such an inevitable fact.
too fool am i to be locked in a fake feeling that i created by my own unintelligent self.
i suffered for false dignity when there's a light right in front of my beautiful eyes.
i lie to myself, lie to my heart when the truth is already known.

if only i knew.



you made me realize that the real me are not dead, yet.
you made me realize that some people still care.
you made me realize that some people watch you and notice your existence.

you made me realize that, when u thought that everyone does not see ur real color beneath a multicolored canvas.
there's someone who can see that.
there's someone who have a clear eyes and see you beneath the character that you pull yourself to play.
there's someone that you cannot lie because he/she knows the real you because he/she is the only one who sees beneath the surface.

and i basically don't expect that it is you.
yes, you.
you that care so much about me but too shy to even speak a little word like "hi" to start a conversation with me.
yes, you.
you that know who i am from how i speak to everyone else, when i don't even speak to you.
yes, you.
you that keep your feelings towards me as a secret until now.

you.
the one that i love so much.
because no matter what u do, i stupidly think that it is simply cute.
because no matter how mad i am to u, u keep calm n resist urself from fire me up.
i'm sorry for my temper.
i'm sorry for my words.
i'm sorry for all the terrilble things i've done.
i'm sorry for blaming you when i am the one who must be blame.

please realize that u r the person i am talking about right now.

please...
because i want u to know that..
when i am with you. even you are so far a way. or so near to me.
i feel like there only the 2 of us in this world.
no one else.

no one else.

just u and me.

u.


me.


only us.




yes, i love u.



Comments

Mim said…
You made me all teary-eyed! I wonder who the 'you' mentioned here. I wonder.
But whoever that is, I pray for him to realize that he is the one you talk about, I pray for him to be patient and to keep on waiting for you. And of course I pray for both of you to happy, regardless of what life gives you.
All the best Atiqah :)
fawh said…
okehhh jiwanggggg!
hahaha
afiqah said…
wow :)
nicely written...
he's a lucky guy~